A Mess

I am just going to put this out there... I am a MESS!! I have gained weight like crazy. I cry at the drop of a hat. I snap at people for no good reason. I need help, mainly with motivation, doing even easy tasks.

MESS!!!

My kids are back in school and we have a somewhat normal schedule - if it's ever really normal. I have gotten somewhat used to not hearing news regarding adoption. Isn't that sad?

I know, I am rambling. Blogging is like a little therapy session for me - so welcome to my thoughts.

My most recent thorn in my side, so to speak, has been planning the Reece's Rainbow table at the local Buddy Walk. Last year I was excited to be a part of this experience. I just KNEW that I would be joining them this year with my treasure by my side. And now... planning it this year and not having her... It's a major cross. You know? I WANT to go. I WANT to help. I WANT to spread good cheer and thoughts about Reece's Rainbow and adoption... But honestly, right now I am LOW. Adoption has always been my 'light at the end of the tunnel' of infertility. And now, it's growing dimmer every day. Doesn't that just STINK?!?! I hate that I feel this way!!! WHY!?!? Why does it have to be hard, too???? POOPOO ON IT ALL!!!!!!

I guess I better lift up my chin and grin and bear it. I have signed up to be a Angel Tree sponsor for this doll. I think I needed to get this off my chest before I start the process to fundraise for her...

Thanks for listening.

And now a bit of happiness.